Sore Throat, Sore heart?

I know I may seem bitter at times about life, But I'm actually a really fun person and I realized no matter what happens to me... I'm always happy somehow or the other. May be its how my soul has adapted to face all the load of shit in my life. But lately NOTHING seems to bother me, NOTHING and I'm happy about it :)

I have a horrible sore throat, I sound like a tranny according to Charan :( I hope it gets better. Zhen has made me laugh a million times today,love this pixie!...She really wants to me to go ROOTZ tomorrow and I'm just not in the mood. As much as I love dancing, clubbing has kinda become very boring and meaningless. I want to do something that fills my soul with this positive energy. Going clubbing makes me feel really itchy the next day cuz of the allergic reaction to the booze(eventhough i drink little), I feel so sleepy and tired for the next two days and worst of all I feel like I should have NEVER gone in the first place.. Clubbing just isn't me, I mean it is great to get your mind of things by dancing but i think I'm much better now and hence can control my emotions.

I think many people think I've got a sore  heart. To some extent I agree I do. I mean love had nothing to offer me. The one man I loved with an open heart, practically tore out my heart and shoved a steak through it. May be he thought I was a vampire and I was going to hurt him in the future. But boy was he wrong. Ever since then, love just hasn't been the same. I don't really let that kind of shit get to me..I enjoy the lighter things in life. I mean I'm 21 and this whole love mambo jambo is just too much to handle. I'll think about it once I have NOTHING ELSE to think about. Right now my mind, heart and soul are occupied with more important things in life. I love it this way, I'm truly at peace.

Life is such, its unfair and full of ups and downs. We gotta enjoy every bit of it even the rough bits and yes that's exactly what I'm going.

For once I'm not just ALIVE, but I'm FINALLY living :)