is everything you wana stay away from, is everything you don't wanna be..is all that you don't want

Hahahaha, I'm a little offf, was sad and had a drink...cuz everyone was drinking..had 3 drinks. 2 with coke one raw..i pouredit myself and poured a double pack twice.shhhhnow one noes! hahahahaha. its funny how things go sometimes, you expect lots of things butnotihng happens. people thin your god but they blame you when soemthings goes wrong. suicide is a serious attemtpt.you dont just go and do it. Why dont people ever thinka bout the people who love them. I'm relli sad andddd i don't know who to tell. The people i wana tell wont understand, while the people who i do wanna tell i cant...i am sooooooooo well at the moment dizzzyyyyyy. I never thought iw ould be stuck in this lonely place whererw no one will dinfff me...i will never be found. it slike being in a hole and left to rot, like dead flesh. the more i sit ehre the more i rot away, soon i'll be engulfed by the filthiest maggots int he world. life is a gift and people shld see tht....i wish i could change thigns,  i wish i had some sueprnatural power to make bad things go away.but i dont..i relli don. i cant help it, after all im human. it never hit me how alone i m in this world, funny thing is I'm surrounded by people everywhere. haha.

no one will understand, and no obe will ever get it. I hopei dont regret posting this tomolo. I am high as hell and i wonder how it would be ike to read this.

All i know is, right now all i have is a friend Dhiva, Zhen, God and myself.

if it werent for dhiva and Zhen i'd prolly be dead :)

you two are my angels...thank you

I'm not perfect, I'm not the best...but let me tell you, i'm not like the rest.
You may see me laugh and you may see me smile...
but can u see the hidden tears inside.

What you see is not what you get,
just like how life is a bet,
you choose a path and don't know what to expect..

 behind a smile,
there are a thousand sorrows
my fear is
i'll soon be hollow

with no love to give,
with no care to provide
with no empathy
or no smile...

I'll become a corpse,
ready to die..
each day will become
a challenge to survuve

the rockstar has left the bulding!